Keeping Up and Being Social

The work just keeps piling up. Since I arrived, I have been assigned to create a worship service based on a certain battlefield scenario. Mine involves heavily fatigued soldiers who have been in contact with the enemy for three days. No one has been killed but 14 have been wounded. Additionally, there is a new mission to execute with a "high risk factor." There are several different scenarios that the chaplains receive. We have been delivering these 20 minute services in the field and giving some constructive criticism. Many of us are seasoned preachers with a wide range of styles, theological perspectives, and effectiveness. Some of the preaching is very conversion oriented and yet seems appropriately earnest. Others are more reflective. I sometimes find myself considering that it is not so much what we say as the fact that we are there and that grace is available regardless of eloquence or ability. In regular daily worship one of the best sermons I heard so far was fairly simple, but got to the heart of the matter in the ways of chaplaincy. The colonel who was delivering focused on the Army's value of selfless service and Micah's passage that reminds us that God does not want exorbitant sacrifice, but to "do justice and to love mercy and walk humbly with your God."

Other work includes a counseling paper, an ethics paper, preparing our battle books, being physically prepared to pass the PT test and to use all of this in a "Capstone" event where we will spend four days in the field. Yesterday we marched with our ruck sacks on for three miles at 5 A.M. in order to get a feel for it and prepare our feet. I will devote most of the rest of this weekend to diving into the assignments, getting some exercise, getting some groceries, and resting.

One of the things that I most appreciate about the chaplains who are teaching the courses is that they are persons of integrity who aren't just dispensing doctrine to us. Many show humor, warmth, strength of character, and a keen ability to deal with ambiguity and the gray areas of human behavior, the military, and religion. This part of who they are appeals to me greatly because of their appreciation for the complexities of all the situations with which we may come in contact. These are not individuals with a "one size fits all mentality," they are committed and enlightened persons who show a great deal of passion for their work. Being here is definitely stimulating.

I had a couple of conversations with student chaplains that were more or less a reminder that real differences exist between us, even in the midst of the goodwill and camaraderie. One of the questions that we frequently ask each other in small talk or introduction is "Who is your endorser?" (Meaning: What denomination is your sponsor?) One of my neighbors, a gentle man who stutters at times was surprised that I was highly supportive of the recent commercials that the United Church of Christ ran showing various "outsiders" including gay couples entering a church. He at first asked me about accountability for sin and turning people to Christ. I said that it was important to show welcome and to nurture people in faith. I didn't go so far to say that Jesus himself hung around the outsiders of his day. The next day the young chaplain briefly spoke to me apologetically and said that he appreciates the graciousness of such a message. It still seemed as though he was confounded by the idea of the existence of such a church and that someone would care to enter the military as a chaplain from such a church. I was reminded of a conversation that I had with my Associate Conference Minister, Karen King who said that we liberals have just a claim to patriotism as conservatives and that we too, have contributed greatly to the shaping of this nation. In another conversation with a tall and warm young father of seven children who is of the Anglican tradition, he asked me about a senator from PA who is supposedly problematic. Naturally, I replied that this was Santorum. But then he mentioned that it was during the last election that he was being targeted. I realized that he was speaking about Sen. Specter and that we were talking in code over the culture wars. I defended Sen. Specter as being a moderate and that PA needs more like him because we are potentially losing civil liberties... There was no turning back from this collision in the conversation when he said "Do you mean things like the Patriot Act?" I said, "No. I mean things like abortion." (I could have just said "Yes" and leave it at that, but I didn't.) We later decided that we should have lunch or dinner together to discuss other matters. Part of me is slightly wary, because I am one of the very few liberals in this sea of conservatives. Yet there is a civility and warmth that remains in spite of being in an obvious minority.

I have been more social than my usual self. Partly I enjoy learning what makes some of my cohorts tick. And partly, I enjoy discovering how similar we are in our sense of humor. I find humor salvific and bonding in the face of the work load, the sometimes tediousness of the day, and the fact that we will be facing and have already faced difficult paths. Last night I went out with a bunch of guys many of which had prior service and less than pious lives in their younger days. Some had conversion events where they gave their lives to Jesus. At least two had grown up in real "hippie" and intellectual households and may have searched for some structure in their lives. These two men were interesting to me because of their "squared away" exterior and their depth, playfulness, and warmth in their interior. Others are more show a more conservative bent, but still share funny stories from their past. I try to suspend judgment when I hear something that I interiorly question. I recognize the power of the desire to be like others and accepted even at this point in my life. I cannot help but marvel at this point of confluents of souls. I find that I am less self conscious around many of my fellow students and optimistic for my choice to be here and engage in this calling. It is challenging, enlivening, enriching and meaningful.